Standing Room Only by Heidi Mastrogiovanni

Author:Heidi Mastrogiovanni
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Women Authors, Man-woman Relationships, Choice (Psychology), Los Angeles (Calif.), Paris (France), Fiction, Widow, Mourning, Film-making, Animal Rescue, Commitment Issues
ISBN: 9781944995744
Publisher: Amberjack Publishing
Published: 2018-09-04T04:00:00+00:00

“Okay, Kenny, in my defense, it’s not like I spent my life walking around pronouncing my name as if I were a Parisian, okay? Peh-tee-bown doesn’t bring to mind the French words for little and good, okay? Though I have to confess, now that I’ve heard it, I can’t fathom how it never occurred to me before.”

They were sitting at a table for four at the window of Les Petits Fromages next to the veterinary clinic. Their host, Vincent, had spoken to them in the French of a sailor in Marseille who had decided to imitate Professor Henry Higgins’s lesson for Eliza Doolittle that involved talking with a mouthful of marbles. Lala couldn’t catch anything after Vincent said, “Bienvenue!” so Kenny had to simultaneously translate in their own mini-version of the United Nations.

“He went to high school with Veronique’s father in Provence. He says she’s like a daughter to him. He wants us to try a special bottle of Sancerre.”

And now they were loving that special bottle of white wine, which Vincent had just brought to the table and opened, and for which Lala thanked him profusely. In French.

“Merci mille fois, Monsieur. Vous êtes trop gentil!”

Vincent smiled and winked at her and had a blank look in his eyes that clearly indicated that everything she had just said had been Greek to him. Lala scrunched her face up as she watched Vincent toddle back to the kitchen.

“Kenny, I would just like to point out that my current boyfriend, who is fluent in French and a bunch of other languages, complimented my accent when he met me, and I sang Hier Encore with him at a karaoke night, and also when I spoke French with him after we—”

“Oh, well, okay, Lala, obviously he was trying to fuck you. And I say that with all due affection. Wait . . . He heard you sing and he still wanted to fuck you?”

Lala snorted a laugh and kicked Kenny under the table, just as Veronique and a very petite blonde woman, who was probably shorter than Lala, came in. Vincent rushed over to them and embraced them both. There was much kissing on both cheeks and many smiles. Lala beamed at the women as they approached the table. They were very quickly followed by Vincent, bearing another bottle of Sancerre.

“You all are so nice!” Lala crowed. “And I haven’t even officially met your wife yet, and I already like her! And I would say that all in French, but you’d probably all have to try to not laugh, and dear Vincent wouldn’t understand me! How do you say ‘exclamation points’ in French?”

Veronique introduced her wife, Camille, while Vincent ran off and came back in what seemed like no time with four plates covered with omelets and salad and round little pommes frites.

“Omigod, this food is delicious!” Lala said. “Kenny, can you translate for me so Vincent knows that I think he’s amazing? You’re both veterinarians? That is SO cool! WOW! I have to tell you, I made a very brief visit to the Island of Lesbos.

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